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  #21  
Old 08-18-2008, 05:31 AM
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When I was around 1 1/2, my mom was doing a little painting and happened to leave a bucket of paint on the ground with a brush in it. I then proceded to paint our tv a nice, white color. Needless to say, my mom freaked out. sadly, we no longer have that tv.
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  #22  
Old 08-18-2008, 05:32 AM
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Aww. The Screen?
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  #23  
Old 08-18-2008, 05:32 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by admiralroot View Post
When I was around 1 1/2, my mom was doing a little painting and happened to leave a bucket of paint on the ground with a brush in it. I then proceded to paint our tv a nice, white color. Needless to say, my mom freaked out. sadly, we no longer have that tv.
Makes it hard to watch.
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  #24  
Old 08-18-2008, 05:38 AM
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Makes it hard to watch.
She did clean it off though and yes, it was the screen. Also, when I was 4, for some reason, I sprayed baking grease into my brother's eyes (about one at the time) and my parents weren't pleased.
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  #25  
Old 08-18-2008, 05:40 AM
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Did You Boldly Destroy A Life?
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  #26  
Old 08-18-2008, 01:25 PM
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I remember when I was about 15 and living in Washington state, I somehow got the notion to "expend all munitions" as it were after a 4th of July celebration.

We had a number of varying firecracker types left in our house. I decided (and I swear I don't know what possessed me to do this) to round 'em all up, and grab an empty milk jug, and an old rag.

My dad was asleep on the couch in the living room.

I go out in our back yard, and set the old plastic milk jug up on a picnic table we had. (It was red, wooden, and solidly built).

I opened up the firecrackers carefully, and poured their explosive powders into the jug. By the time I finished with pouring the contents, there was probably a half-inch thick layer of explosive in the jug. I sprinkled just a little bit of powder onto the rag, to try and speed up the fuse process.

My oversized firecracker was completed. Now it was time to test the firepower of this fully armed and operational milk jug. I'm thinking quite literally: "If I dood this, I det a whupin' ......I dood it." I lit the fuse, and ran back inside the house to my bedroom. My dad was still asleep on the couch...quite soundly.

I look out my bedroom window, which has the perfect view of the back yard. The fuse was one third of the way burned, and still going. I'm thinking to myself: "Steve, what the hell are you doing? You probably oughtta go out there and stop this." By that time, the fuse actually accelerated, and my next thought was: "Steve, why are you standing right in the window?.....DUCK!!!"

Just as I ducked, the jug went :
BAMMMMM!!!!!!........................
The sound reverberated well beyond our neighborhood.

The next thing you know....I hear : THUD!!! "What the hell--?!" in the living room. My dad had just gotten jolted out of a pretty nice nap.

I was laughing, and almost crying at the same time. Laughing because of the event...and almost crying because I knew the consequences would be severe. I looked outside. Amazingly enough, the picnic table was still there, but with a big scorch mark where there was once an innocent pawn of a milk jug in my scheme.

My dad walks outside, sees the aftermath, and sees me staring out the window laughing. He shakes his head, and comes back inside to my room. He simply closes the door, and from beyond the door I simply hear: "Do not--I mean do NOT step out of this door until supper time."

"Yes, sir," I reply, actually managing to restrain my laughter just long enough to give him the respect (and gratitude) such a response deserved.

As soon as I knew he was out of earshot, my laughter resumed.
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Old 08-18-2008, 01:43 PM
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I was always a brown-nosing good little boy, so I don't have too many good ones, but here's the most humorous:

I was probably three, and I loved Thomas the Tank Engine. I had a big bin of the wooden play track, and I wanted to play with it with my mom in our (then) very small den/nook off of the kitchen. My mom was cooking, or something, and she said she would maybe later, but she couldn't then. I was a bit upset, so I decided to take action. I reached up for the phone and dialed the only number I knew by heart. You guessed it, 911. I don't know what I thought it would do, but I wanted to play trains, damnit! As soon as someone at the center picked up and said "Hello" I hung up. My mom asked if I had called grandma (RIP) and I said yes. I then proceeded to hide underneath my mom's clothes chair she used as a sort of closet.

an officer did come, and I got a nice long talk about what 911 was for.
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  #28  
Old 08-18-2008, 02:40 PM
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okay i got one

when i was about six (six?, yah six, speach therapy started that year) i cut my own hair

MANY times

ah hell, i still cut barbie hair. just today i found one and decided to take a hack at it :P (she looks like a scene teen girl, but hey it's fun)
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  #29  
Old 08-19-2008, 02:41 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by martok2112 View Post
I remember when I was about 15 and living in Washington state, I somehow got the notion to "expend all munitions" as it were after a 4th of July celebration.

We had a number of varying firecracker types left in our house. I decided (and I swear I don't know what possessed me to do this) to round 'em all up, and grab an empty milk jug, and an old rag.

My dad was asleep on the couch in the living room.

I go out in our back yard, and set the old plastic milk jug up on a picnic table we had. (It was red, wooden, and solidly built).

I opened up the firecrackers carefully, and poured their explosive powders into the jug. By the time I finished with pouring the contents, there was probably a half-inch thick layer of explosive in the jug. I sprinkled just a little bit of powder onto the rag, to try and speed up the fuse process.

My oversized firecracker was completed. Now it was time to test the firepower of this fully armed and operational milk jug. I'm thinking quite literally: "If I dood this, I det a whupin' ......I dood it." I lit the fuse, and ran back inside the house to my bedroom. My dad was still asleep on the couch...quite soundly.

I look out my bedroom window, which has the perfect view of the back yard. The fuse was one third of the way burned, and still going. I'm thinking to myself: "Steve, what the hell are you doing? You probably oughtta go out there and stop this." By that time, the fuse actually accelerated, and my next thought was: "Steve, why are you standing right in the window?.....DUCK!!!"

Just as I ducked, the jug went :
BAMMMMM!!!!!!........................
The sound reverberated well beyond our neighborhood.

The next thing you know....I hear : THUD!!! "What the hell--?!" in the living room. My dad had just gotten jolted out of a pretty nice nap.

I was laughing, and almost crying at the same time. Laughing because of the event...and almost crying because I knew the consequences would be severe. I looked outside. Amazingly enough, the picnic table was still there, but with a big scorch mark where there was once an innocent pawn of a milk jug in my scheme.

My dad walks outside, sees the aftermath, and sees me staring out the window laughing. He shakes his head, and comes back inside to my room. He simply closes the door, and from beyond the door I simply hear: "Do not--I mean do NOT step out of this door until supper time."

"Yes, sir," I reply, actually managing to restrain my laughter just long enough to give him the respect (and gratitude) such a response deserved.

As soon as I knew he was out of earshot, my laughter resumed.
Great story!!
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  #30  
Old 08-19-2008, 05:01 AM
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I Was About Four, And A So- So Kid.


My House Walls Are White. One Day I Decided My Room Needed Wall Paper. So i Went To My Sisters Room, Told My Sister To Come To My Room, And Rounded Up Some Crayons. I Went Inside My Room, And Me And My Sister Started Scribbiling Different Colors All Over The Room!
It Was A Mess. But, I Decided To Tell My Mom What A GREAATTTT Job I Did. When My Mom Woke, I Told Her, Come Look At My Room. I Think She Thought I Had Cleaned It. I Made Her Cover Her Eyes. When We Went Into My Room I Said " Surprise". Then...... JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSHHHHHHHH! I Said, You Don't Like It?
But Theres More. Later In The Day, I Went To My Room, And Saw My Mom And Dad Scrubbing Away At The Walls. I Ran Outside And Died Laughing.
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