[MissionTrek08]

Originally Posted by Zardoz

I allrady stated what I like to look at, hard to tell someone's brain as they walk by. No one ever says, "Hey, look at the IQ on THAT one!"

True, it's hard to notice intelligence visually at a distance, but up close an intelligent woman will always get my attention. Smart women are very attractive... in fact, I prefer them a bit smarter than I am (which isn't hard to find, haha!) to keep me on my toes.

[Zardoz]

Originally Posted by MissionTrek08

True, it's hard to notice intelligence visually at a distance, but up close an intelligent woman will always get my attention. Smart women are very attractive... in fact, I prefer them a bit smarter than I am (which isn't hard to find, haha!) to keep me on my toes.

Well I married smarter than me, not that she'd ever admit it....lol, for the same reasons you mentioned.

[Berengarius7]

Intellect doesn't matter to me either. It's whether she has a heart or not. If she really likes me, if she really loves me enough to give of herself to make me happy as much as i am willing to do the same. I want someone who really gives a damn whether i live or die and cares whether i am happy or sad and wishes to help me get through the day in one piece. In other words: love. The only kind of love i know. Not some mystical, unseen, esoteric force that can only be tapped into by the enlightened and intitiated, but whatever you're willing to do that might make my life better somehow, and vice versa. That's what matters to me. I don't know how to put it any better than that. Sorry if any of you are confused by that.

[Zardoz]

Originally Posted by Berengarius7

Intellect doesn't matter to me either. It's whether she has a heart or not. If she really likes me, if she really loves me enough to give of herself to make me happy as much as i am willing to do the same. I want someone who really gives a damn whether i live or die and cares whether i am happy or sad and wishes to help me get through the day in one piece. In other words: love. The only kind of love i know. Not some mystical, unseen, esoteric force that can only be tapped into by the enlightened and intitiated, but whatever you're willing to do that might make my life better somehow, and vice versa. That's what matters to me. I don't know how to put it any better than that. Sorry if any of you are confused by that.

Man, that was a very heart felt statement. I am impressed!

I understand totally.

The love in my personal realtionship is a given. we can trust each other to the ends of the earth. we can say literally anything ot each other. We are 2 parts of a whole.

It's all facets of the same thing, Love!

[FanWriter45]

[quote=Zardoz;45315]But how many guys worry about their...attributes. Society has made an issue of breats for women, and that's not cool.



Zardoz,

Our shallow, materialistic society puts pressures on both sexes for endowments and "perfection." Frankly, if it were possible to actually increase a guy's endowment as easily as it is for a woman to get breast implants, the lines around the hospital would look like the opening day of a Star Wars film. Still, having been in the trenches of the sexual revolution since the late 70's, I can tell you that the emphasis on men's "size" is deeply misguided. Yes, there's a certain aesthetic value to being large, but I've also met some guys who were awfully damn lonely because they were too big.

The bottom line is that if you think that your whole sexuality begins and ends between your legs, you're in for a rude awakening. To be a good, if not great lover in this day and age, requires knowing yourself, and your partner, and being willing to do the work of learning about each other's wants, needs and desires.

This thread is predicated on the idea that we know what these actors and actresses are actually like once the camera's stop rolling. It's a nice fantasy, but we just end up projecting a lot of our own desires onto them. As I said, I like Joleane Blaylock a lot. But for all I know, she could be an utter pig. (Or she chould be everything her publicist makes her out to be.) Chances are we'll never know if the objects (and that's what we're reducing these people to) are worthy of our attention or not. All we have is the fantasy.

[Zardoz]

[quote=FanWriter45;45512]

Originally Posted by Zardoz

But how many guys worry about their...attributes. Society has made an issue of breats for women, and that's not cool.



Zardoz,

Our shallow, materialistic society puts pressures on both sexes for endowments and "perfection." Frankly, if it were possible to actually increase a guy's endowment as easily as it is for a woman to get breast implants, the lines around the hospital would look like the opening day of a Star Wars film. Still, having been in the trenches of the sexual revolution since the late 70's, I can tell you that the emphasis on men's "size" is deeply misguided. Yes, there's a certain aesthetic value to being large, but I've also met some guys who were awfully damn lonely because they were too big.

The bottom line is that if you think that your whole sexuality begins and ends between your legs, you're in for a rude awakening. To be a good, if not great lover in this day and age, requires knowing yourself, and your partner, and being willing to do the work of learning about each other's wants, needs and desires.

This thread is predicated on the idea that we know what these actors and actresses are actually like once the camera's stop rolling. It's a nice fantasy, but we just end up projecting a lot of our own desires onto them. As I said, I like Joleane Blaylock a lot. But for all I know, she could be an utter pig. (Or she chould be everything her publicist makes her out to be.) Chances are we'll never know if the objects (and that's what we're reducing these people to) are worthy of our attention or not. All we have is the fantasy.

Fan-

Couldn't agree more. Society is odd when it comes to "Beauty/Sexuality." But, as we discussed earlier in the thread, there's "looking" (Like you Joleane example), and what is beautiful "inside" (for lack of a better term.)

When it comes to male attributes, most women aren't after a guy who can "rope cattle," so to speak, although I am sure there are those that do. Most want a caring situation with a person and as much attention as they give. Makes sesne when you think about it.

As far as actors and such. I am sure they are good, or bad, people who are just like us in many respects, except for what they do for a living.

But yes fantasy and reality are diffrent creatures but we need both. To be psycologically heathy, you need a good fanatsy life. But no extreme of one, or another.

At the risk of repeating myself, I got very lucky, and got it all in one person. But it wasn't without effort.