Spock would attempt the vulcan neckbench.
Vader would counter it with choke, then bones would run to aid him with healing etc
kirk would end up in a brief scuffle before finally seducing vader and luring him to the not quite light, but not too dark side.
Captain: " We would like to remind all passengers that this is a non smoking ship. However should you require to smoke please feel free to join us on the bridge where we have just opened a window".