My Review of Their Review
1. Just a Joke... Just a Copout (00:00)
They start and end the video by letting us know that this is just all in good fun. But the content in between lets us know that they are serious about their misgivings based on this new trailer for the movie. As evidence to this, most of their criticisms resemble the same serious
criticisms a lot of people have here.
2. Kirk Boy Driving Part I (00:47)
This section started out being more of a joking manner. I'll give them that. However, their comparison to "Indiana Jones 4" spells doom for the movie's reviews. It's basically one of my biggest fears for this movie that audience members are going to bring with them all their hate and anger and disappointment they had over movies like "Indiana Jones 4", the "Star Wars" prequels, and "Transformers" to this film and whether or not the movie is good, the movie will still fail for them.
3. Kirk Boy Driving Part II (01:09)
I'll keep saying this over and over until I'm sure everyone's either heard it or you Purists actually give me a response to it. Or rather I won't say it but someone else will:
"Another thing that makes canon a little confusing. Gene R. himself had a habit of decanonizing things. He didn't like the way the animated series turned out, so he proclaimed that it was not canon. He also didn't like a lot of the movies. So he didn't much consider them canon either. And – okay, I'm really going to scare you with this one – after he got TNG
going, he... well... he sort of decided that some of The Original Series
wasn't canon either. I had a discussion with him once, where I cited a couple things that were very clearly canon in The Original Series
, and he told me he didn't think that way anymore, and that he now thought of TNG
as canon wherever there was conflict between the two. He admitted it was revisionist thinking, but so be it." - Paula Block, VCP Senior Director of Licensed Publishing
Nuff said. Okay moving on.
4. Kirk Boy Driving Part III (01:36)
Kirk is a boy. As much as Kirk in his senior had a respect for antiques, boys with their toys get a little more destructive even with things they like. Not many youngsters have respect for antiques (place "purist" joke here about "yeah, just look at Star Trek XI"). I'm willing to bet that old Jim Kirk probably regrets doing that. P.S. You can't drive glasses off the cliff. I know that was just a joke, but I can only laugh when the joke works and that one didn't.
5. Kirk Boy Driving Part IV (02:15)
Again a reference to another apparent "franchise ruiner" one of the Star Wars prequels. It was meant in a joking matter, I get it. But that's the attitude I fear is going to be brung to this film by audience members.
6. Bad Grammar Alert (02:30)
I can understand if someone were narrating the film, then correct grammar is needed. But in actual dialogue perfect grammar is a little annoying and unrealistic... I don't get this criticism at all.
7. Francise Ruiner Referrence (03:00)
Again meant to be joking, but the attitude is there.
8. Ship Size Criticism (03:19)
First they aren't taking into account the fact that the construction necessities take up more space than the ship. That could make the ship appear bigger than it actually is, and... did as far as I could see. Secondly I'm not sure they really know what they're talking about in terms of perception. Is the ship really that frikken big in the movie or are they just ignoring how it looks to Kirk's perception, where he is, basically just to find something to complain about. They said he was "a couple miles away". Funny I didn't get that. It looked to me he was much closer, which being that close could make the ship loom a lot more.
7. "Sex Over the Phone" (04:11)
NOT REALLY CAPTAIN KIRK!!!!???? What in Christ's name...?! Sex appeal was what they were going for with the ORIGINAL CAPTAIN KIRK!!!!! IDIOTS!!!!
8. Lord of the Rings Speeches (05:00)
I don't understand this. That's the sort of speech that Sarek would give to his son. It would sound mystical and self important a little bit because that's all within that character. How else do they want Sarek to talk? He talked like this in the past... Are they... are they really Star Trek fans?
9. Vulcan Personality Criticism (05:44)
How many times did Spock say "I'm half human." And actually Kirk says "Why don't you stop me?" prior to Spock attacking. This leads me to believe that there may be more to this in terms of what lead Spock even a fully Vulcan Spock to take action. Kirk maybe trying to carry out some sort of act that could put the crew in jeopardy. Logically, desperate times do sometimes call for desperate measures.
10. Sex Sells (06:11)
Alright! They actually go, wait we were wrong. Okay, sex always selled on Star Trek. I applaud them for this.
11. Scotty Criticism (06:51)
What's their problem? Scotty has always been the uppy character. Although it would have been nice to include him saying something about getting the job done later than he actually could. Those sort of fun easter eggs will no doubt be saved for the actually movie. Their crack on Simon Pegg is a little odd too. He seems very much the Trek fan and someone who would gladly take this role for no money down.
12. McCoy's Southern Accent (07:42)
Not exactly sure what they're expecting here. "Well, I tells Jimmy, space is full o' diseases and all. Yeap. *spit*
" McCoy had a hint of a Southern accent that only seemed to really come out when he was getting older (the first TNG episode showed its most extreme). One thing I've always noticed about McCoy's accent is his pronunciation of his r.
This was actually present in the trailer. On a side note, their version of a Southern accent was absolutely horrible.
P.S. This is what makes me think these guys have an account here. Gary Sinise should have been McCoy? I remember someone making that same crack here. And it's a comment that's so outlandish I can't believe more than one person made this comment. Are you insane? The plot is about the early years. These guys are straight out of Academy. Gary Sinise has grandchildren!!!! (Well, I don't know if he does, but he's old enough to). Maybe Captain Pike, but a young McCoy? Smoke some more of that stuff and pass it over cuz I want some.
13. Buckle Up
As a side note, no they don't have seatbelts on the bridge (a part of canon I wouldn't mind them negating). But there are other things they do buckle. The space suit that Spock uses in TMP has a buckling mechanism for instance. They also tear apart dialogue from other films that are recognized by most Trek fans to be great movies (wasn't that First Contact I saw in there? "To hell with our orders" yes! It was!)
14. Chris Pine in Black (09:30)
Answer: maybe because he's not wearing a uniform. As I recall he was supposedly smuggled aboard the ship by his friend McCoy. He's not supposed to be there. Kirk disobeying orders again.
15. Bad Guy ()
I must disagree with these guys, Nero is nothing like the nancyboy of a villain we got in Nemesis.
16. New Ship Design (10:55)
Okay I thought they were going to talk about the ship's interior... which would actually be a more realistic complaint about the change of design with this new movie. Instead they talk about the exterior... which is f-ing picking! You be the judge. Look at 11:49.
THEY LOOK EXACTLY THE %@$&ING SAME!!! OMG! Aside from elongating certain parts, it's the same damn ship! You guys are complete idiots!!!!!
And if you agree with them on that point, I really am sorry, that's complete anal idiocy. It's so anal a porn director is going, "Wow, that's some good material."
Seriously, this movie, as with past movies that a lot of you nitpickers hated (Transformers, Indiana Jones 4, the Star Wars prequels, even the special edition Star Wars, Superman Returns), will only be destroyed by the unforgiving nitpicks.