In the words of William Shatner…
“its just a TV show”
I know that Trek has a deep connection for many of us (myself included) but please… if you want to talk about cannon, look at the dozens of contradictory statements just in TOS about history. Besides Abrams and his gang have made it clear…
First… all the trek history that you so deeply cared about HAPPENED
Second… post TNG a nasty Romulan and a friendly Vulcan go back in time thus HISTORY CHANGES
Third… the bulk of this story takes place in the CHANGED history.
All this means, that the Trek you know and love happened, and set up the circumstances in which this new Trek happens who knows, in time we may be referring to the Abrams vision as ST:TAT for ‘the altered timeline’ or something.